Just Sing...

“Just Sing,”

It seems to be what my heart and soul was crying out for me to do. But everything else told me not to sing. I had just cried till I had no tears left, I had been having a rough day, more like a rough year. I didn’t want to sing, I wanted to cry, I wanted curl up and die temporally, and I did not want to sing. I was to low in spirit that singing would not help, it would not solve my problems, and it would not meet my needs.

“Just sing anyways.”

Oh, but to sing, that would hurt in more ways then one. I used to pride myself in my singing. I had a strong soprano voice, I could reach high notes with easy, and in fact I think I was too proud of it. So when the doctor told me the chance of losing my voice during surgery hit me pretty hard, almost as hard as finding out I had cancer. Singing now would hurt. It would hurt because I could not sing like I used too. It would hurt because the surgery had been recent and the vocal cords where still extremely tender.

“Sing through the pain”

“I can’t sing.” I cried out loud as if it would stop. But it didn’t the urge to sing was still very strong. I was frustrated, I didn’t want to sing, and it wouldn’t solve a thing. It wouldn’t be pretty. In fact I saw no need for the reason to sing.

Then the first verse of a song came to me, one that I barely remember but came to me by heart, and the tears I though could no longer come, flowed down my cheek like a flood.

Their chains were fastened tight,
Down at the jail that night
Still Paul and Silas would not be dismayed
They said, “It’s time to lift our voice
Sing praises to the Lord
Let’s prove that we will trust Him
Come what may”

I was thinking of the chains that held Paul and Silas. They had their back beaten, they were in a jail cell; they had been preaching the gospel and were thrown into prison. My problems seem so little compared to theirs, but worst is they had not made mistakes like mine. Some of my problems were my own fault; I had done something to myself. Some things that were a part of my problem were not things I had done to myself. I was a mass of confusion, but the urge to sing still so strong. The only thing that seemed sane even as crazy as it seemed to me.

I lifted up my crackled voice, my throat was badly sore, my notes were off no matter how much I tried and the sobbing that came made the singing worst. I had no audience but myself and the Lord. The second verse came to me now.

He loves to hear our praise
On our cheerful days
When the pleasant times outweigh the bad, by far
But when suffering comes along
And we still sing Him songs
That is when we bless the Father’s heart

I rather sing when my heart was happy, I would rather sing when things are going good, but to sing in the low time, well I was learning it was a way to touch God. A type of worship, a type of praise, something beyond what seems normal. I wasn’t sure how I sang the chorus, I was crying now too hard. My voice was raw and hurting, and the weight of it all was too strong.

God wants to hear you sing
When the waves are crashing ‘round you
When the fiery darts surround you
And despair is all you see
God wants to hear your voice
When the wisest man has spoken
And says, “Your circumstance is as hopeless as can be”
That’s when God wants to hear you sing

I sang it with all my heart, I sang it from the depths of my soul, I sang till had no voice and I sang it through the tears, through the pain and through all my fears. I simply sang.

When I was done, I sat in silence; I did not feel a thing. Singing did not solve my problems, singing did not relieve the pain but singing did something else. I let out a deep sigh and then it happened. A peace wrapped around me so tight, I nearly couldn’t breath. I didn’t want to move in fear of making it disappear. A peace that passed all understanding filled that room. For the first time in a long time, I fell into a deep, restful sleep, one I hadn’t had for a long time cause I had stayed up worrying and fretting.

When I awake the next morning, my problems were still there and my pain was still strong, but I had found something in sing that passes all understanding. I can’t explain, I could not put in words. Not just any singing, singing unto the Lord.

Many times through the scripture, singing was used to do many things. David played and sang hymns; many of the songs soothed a troubled king’s spirit. Songs were used to celebrate victories; songs were song in times of despair, like with Paul and Silas. Song when sung unto the Lord can be a powerful tool. A song may not solve your problems, songs may not stop the pain but a song can do things you can never imagine.

Singing unto the Lord is a type of worship. Even during our biggest struggles, a song can show God we are learning to trust Him. Songs can bring peace; songs can bring joy in our hearts. Songs can remind us of things, songs allow us to express what we can’t often put in words. Songs can be prayers, a way to heal our spirit. Songs have a way that can not be explained to help us in endless ways.

So whether you have a good voice or not, even if it seems everything is going your way or a storms clouds are gathered. When you are tired and weary, sad or happy, shy or tired remember one thing…

“Just Sing!”

Jacqueline

*God Wants to Hear You Sing, By Greater Vision*