Saturday, December 14, 2013

Garden of Flowers

Garden of Flowers

She was upset, Jo March for years she had to be company for her aunt she very much disliked!  So when her younger sister Amy took over the duties, Jo was glad! More time to write and read, she said.  She didn't realized that Amy would actually form a bond with the cranky old woman.  So when Aunt March decide to go abroad to Europe and asked for Amy to come along and not Jo, Jo was upset.  Jo easy temper flared up, jealousy took over and she expressed loudly to her parents.  But  they would have none of it.

There was something that Jo said that I never forgot. She told her parents that she will pick a bouquet of flowers out of Amy's garden of happiness.  She wouldn't just act happy, she would BE Happy!!!

That simple concept stuck with me for years, and came to mind when I would become jealous or envious or upset at another's happiness.  It wasn't fair for them if I came in and tore up their garden, ruined their flowers and steal their happiness.  But I began to pick a small bouquet of flowers, I'd fake happiness till I got, I felt it. Gathering bits of happiness from others.  Over time as the flowers faded I was left with seeds.

While my family, got to travel, I had to stay home to work. While friends got married, I kept searching for my own love.  While other held bundles of joy, my arms dreamed of the days of the future.  I tried not to complain, prayed through my jealous, wiped away my tears, smiled through the pain and hid my loneliness.  Not one thing was missed by by God.

One Sunday, I sat alone on the pew, the evangelist was in town. He did not know me, the pastor did not say anything to him.  While he was preaching he walked the aisle, stopping near me, he locked eyes. "Your trial is almost over, I can see it.  It's right there. God was showing me during service. It's almost over!!! It's so close, I can see it! I rejoice with you, I can see it! I can see it."

I was going through a lot right then, the words were powerful.  I rejoiced, theses were words from God, no one in that service could deny it.  But I didn't realize the full meaning, while alter call was going on I received another message from the man of God.

"Do you understand what I said?" Before I could answer he went on, "no you don't. God has seen your faithfulness, He has seen your tears, He knows your loneliness.  You honored him with contentment, He hasn't forgotten you." I couldn't contain the tears that rolled down my cheeks when he said the next part. "You have sat on the pew alone for years, you never complained. God has seen you and hasn't forgotten. You will never sit alone again. He is sending you someone, He is coming, you won't be alone. He is sending you a great joy, and one day the pew will be also filled with little joys too. Do you understand?"  I could only nod and cry, "I could see it, I could see it! And I rejoice with you!"

The tears I shed that day was like April Showers to May Flowers. All the seed I had collected from others were blooming now for me.  The following week, I was to have a visitor from a far, someone I cared for deeply. That was in October, his arrival was a ray of sunshine to me. By end of November, my garden was in full bloom.

On November 27th, 2013, Ryan got down on one knee and proposed.  I of course said yes!  My heart is bursting with happiness!!! I had full approval of my pastor, his pastor, his family and many other dear in my life.  As others congratulate us in our upcoming marriage, I was overwhelm with happiness!!!

Don't worry about picking a bouquet, I will freely give you the flowers!  I'm so blessed I will share it with all!  Today I felt like I was throwing flowers to everyone, "Here, be happy not for me but WITH me!" For those that shared their flowers here flowers to thank you for allowing me to share with you before. For others, hold onto the flowers, plant the seeds, water them with prayer, be patient and God will honor you!!!

Never stop sewing seeds, because one day there will be a garden of flowers!

Jacqueline Suzanne

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